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Friday 15 August 2014

The Danger Of Friendship-Relationship


Love is a very complicated thing because it requires two people,
two individuals who are usually as different as they are similar...

Love itself is not something that exists outside the people who feel that they are in love. If that were the case, then every time one person fell in love with another, the other would automaticaly fall in love…

I really wish it were that simple, but believe me when I tell you it isn’t.

Just because you feel a certain way about a person does not guarantee that the person will or can feel the same about you.
And this is just the reason we start our relationships on the platform of friendship-relationship.

We see friendship as a plaform to get close to each other, to know our weaknesses, get sexually attracted to each other, get used to each other, know either part likes and dislikes, best colour, food, friend, family and many more…

Tenaciously, the idea of friendship-relationship is the best way to know who you are getting hooked with.

We are all exposed to the advantages of friendship-relationship, but am going to discuss here, the danger of friendship-relationship.

Am going to start with a story of a pretty lady who are future looks bright but eventually all took another form.

Laura meet Davidson at the institution, both became best of friend. Davidson will take his time to teach laura some courses, motivate, inspire and encourage her. They both like each other so much, always happy to see eachother…

Their intimacy grew stronger and not noticeable to Davidson that Laura already had a misconception of their relationship. she already fell for him and Davidson didn’t know. After two years of friendship, Davidson introduced his girl lover to Laura… she was extremely shocked, finding it difficult to accept this, she developed a mental problem, lost her academic credibility, lost her beauty and Davidson moved on with his life.

                     Hey! Syfur, my guy hasn’t declared his intention. Am also in this kind of situation, please what’s the way out?


It’s essential to your relationship success that you express your desires, your heart up front and keep the lines of communication open.
This will cut down on misunderstanding and unneccessary rellationship drama like the one discussed above.

              Syfur,how do I go about this?

First, find a confortable and safe enviroment , a place where you will not be ashamed to cry if need be.

Secondly, take a deep breath, summon your inner strength. Then communicate your heart with questions like;
                  Who am I to you? Whats your motive towards me? Can you define this relationship? Are we just friends or are we into a relationship?.

This sometimes looks so hard on the females. You will agree with me that this isn’t proposal. You are not proposing, all you trying to do is to save yourself from what Laura experienced.

Your partner will most truly appreciate you for being honest and that may deepen the level of intimacy between you or loosen it.

Communicate your essential need by expressing your feeling in a healthy way. If s/he respond favourably then you are on your way to building a solid and healthy relationship or, if they seem unwilling to meet you half way or uninterested in you, you are now armed with the information you need to decide if you would like to work on the relationship or cut your losses and move on.

Let every relationship be properly defined so as to save yourself from unnecessary relationship drama…